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Dr. Mazing Review

Here is a review of the Xbox Indie Game Dr. Mazing. Is it aMazing? Read on to find out.

BitCore Studios conducts a lobotomy with a rusted spoon on those who buy Dr. Mazing in Infinite Energy Crisis, the 240 :MSPoints: “game”.  Though the MSPaint-driven art style may lure gamers into purchasing what they may believe to be a game that is surely so bad it’s good, the sad truth of the matter is that the title actually tries to pass as an Indie Game.  I mourn for those who were suckered into spending 240 precious points on Dr. Mazing.

Lord Gozal Nim seeks to conquer the galaxy, and if he really wants it that badly, you should let him win.  DMiIEC is a painful 2D side scroller that requires two thumbs, loads of patience, and either a good sense of humor or a bountiful stock of alcohol.  Move right, hit punch, and take a shot of hard liquor (or for our underage readers, Kool-Aid; maybe the sugar rush will inspire an Xbox-breaking episode that will save you from this game).  These are all the instructions you need for DMiIEC.

[nggtags gallery=DrMazing]

Throughout the ten levels of the game, you’ll face off against aliens, robots, and poorly implemented mechanics.   While playing through Dr. Mazing, I noticed that these enemies can, when properly lined up, damage each other.  I thought that I was being clever in tricking the AI into attacking itself.  In actuality, these little robots and aliens were simply trying to escape the hell that they are forced to relive every time someone starts up a copy of Dr. Mazing.  Perhaps this is why the laser-shooting forces of the game take no pity upon you as you try your best to get within poorly-animated punching, kicking, or drop-kicking range.  You’ll be able to grab for weapons, such as grenades and trash cans, but the old adage “never bring a trash can to a laser fight” holds as true as it ever did.

This point is painfully driven home when experiencing the awful hit detection of DMiIEC.  Errant lasers fired above the Doctor (show me the degree) often damage him all the same.  Grenade and trash can arcs take some practice before they can be properly utilized.  By “some practice” I mean “a few drinks”.  Might I prescribe an Amaretto Sour?

The soundtrack is the only validating element of this title, if you can really go so far as to claim that DMiIEC can be salvaged.  Some unknowns pool their talents to create a track list that bests most Indie Games out there…if you don’t mind hip hop.  Not even this is sacred, as Dr. Mazing awkwardly moans like an irate ape whenever he is hit.

There are cut-scenes, if you can call MSPaint-created scenes such.  The interludes (read: adult beverage refill opportunities) push the crippled story along as best they can, but I’ll save you time (and money) with a brief spoiler: aliens bad, punching good.  For the points that you just saved, you can now buy three games that are much better than DMiIEC.

Doctor Mazing supports local co-op, but I wouldn’t recommend it unless you want to play Xbox with someone you really hate.  Maybe you have an annoying sibling who tattled on you, or perhaps you want to get back at your friend who stole your significant other.  These are two of the very few reasons why anyone should be forced to play Doctor Mazing in Infinite Energy Crisis.

I tried to discern enjoyable moments of the game in order to balance out all the negativity, but there was little I could find.  Indie Games should absolutely carry the support of gamers, that up-and-coming talent may aspire for greatness and possibly reach it.  That said, these games should EARN your support, and perhaps even moreso, your money.  This game earns neither.  The best thing about Doctor Mazing in Infinite Energy Crisis?  You can delete it.

More information on Dr. Mazing in Infinite Energy Crisis can be found on the Marketplace.

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